Dang y’all — what a year, huh? How is everyone out there?

My little family here is doing fine. So far no virus in our household. I feel like I shouldn’t write that out loud. Having everyone at home all the time was a bit of a challenge for me. In real estate parlance, our home is “cozy.” In realistic terms, we live in a small house. There is nowhere to escape. Thankfully we do get along pretty well, but I need a wee more time to myself.

I didn’t want to add to all the noise that has been happening for the last few months, so I didn’t write anything. I do have some thoughts about our times, I’m just pretty sure nobody wants to hear them right now. Not many seem to be in a listening mood.

So I’ll just take this time to be completely random again.

Driving down the road one day it occurred to me that God never gets to be surprised. Not being surprised by bad stuff is really good, I want that in a God. But He doesn’t get to be surprised by good stuff. You know that feeling when somebody does something really unexpectedly nice for you? He doesn’t get to experience that flabbergasted-ness. HE KNOWS EVERYTHING. So no surprise parties for God. No unexpected gifts. It kinda made me like, “Awww, but that’s a great feeling.” Then I remembered that Jesus was surprised a time or two while walking in flesh among us. So maybe He thinks about that — it made me feel better.

My girls and I have been binge-watching Lost over the last month. Since I watched it when it originally aired, it has been very difficult for me to keep my mouth shut on plot points and who dies and whatnot. Apparently, though, I missed quite a few episodes way back when, which is probably why I didn’t know at that time quite what was happening. It helps to watch all the episodes… who knew? It also helps to watch them one right after the other—there were connections throughout the episodes that I completely missed the first time around. We now only have the series finale left to watch.

I recently saw a headline saying something about how the guy who runs Chick-fil-A thinks that all white people should ask forgiveness for slavery and racism. I did not read the article so I cannot say what the exact quote was or even the context. I read a couple of comments about the article that showed under the headline. People were not happy about it because they didn’t personally do anything. I get that. I feel that. I’m over here simply trying to get to the next day. I don’t have the time or energy to treat people badly. May I suggest though that there is room for national repentance? I really believe that we should have a national day of fasting and repentance asking God how to heal our land.

Getting back to Lost. I told my kids when it first aired, 10-15 years ago, I couldn’t watch the episodes I missed because there was NO on demand. They couldn’t believe it. Truly, this piles on the evidence that I lived in caves for a good portion of my life.

My youngest daughter and I also watched the first season of Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist. We enjoyed it. However, I was not prepared for the sobbing puddle I became during the season finale. It’s a tough watch for someone who has lost a parent or spouse. I just could not keep it together and I bawled my eyes out. My daughter put her arm around me and held me. She really is a sweet girl. I felt kind of stupid, but I guess I still needed that cry after all these years.

I was at the grocery store the other day. I had my earbuds in, bebopping to the tunes. Suddenly, I realized that I was not tired. At. All. Like, not even teeny tiny bit. This is the rarest of rare occasions. I felt… good. Like, really good. I think I laughed out loud. I whispered, “Thank you Lord.” I knew it wouldn’t last but I was filled with wonder. Is this how you other people go through life? I can’t even remember the last time, if ever, I haven’t felt tired, exhausted, or run down. It was glorious.

Because I haven’t been able to go to the gym the last few months, a lot of my heavy thinking happens in the short car rides I take to the store. I ponder why we always hear about the super sacrificial things people have done and were used by God, but never really hear about how they got to that point to choose the sacrifice. What did they suffer? What did they have to work through? What did they have to turn away from? What did they learn along the way? What was it that was worked in the lives of these people that made them choose to follow God so whole-heartedly?

On the flip side, why do testimonies always have to be the most down-and-out, I-completely-destroyed-my-life-and-the-lives-of-everyone-around-me type things? It’s great if you have a testimony like that, don’t get me wrong. Praise God you’re saved from all that. But I think a good portion of people out there don’t really do much to mess up their lives like that and yet, they still need Jesus. You know what I’m saying? You can live a good, decent life and still need Jesus.

Well, it’s finally time to watch the last Lost episode. I’ll try to up my writing game in the near future. I make no promises though.